Impostor

Who:     Dr. KayO and the Biker Chick
What:   Special event, Underwater Photography of SLSO Oboist
When:  Sunday evening
Hosts:   Doctors and Scientists for the Symphony

On the way there, BC wondered aloud what we would say was our medical or scientific specialty. I said I didn't really think anyone would ask.

Boy, was I wrong. Apparently, "Are you a doctor or a scientist?" is the standard icebreaker, like "What's your sign?" Luckily, not many people tried to break the ice with us; unluckily, a few did.

SUSAN: Are you doctors or scientists?
BIKER CHICK: I'm her guest.
KAYO: Um, scientist.
SUSAN: Really? What branch of science?
KAYO: Social.
SUSAN: Oh, really! Actually, I guess I'm a social scientist too, now that you mention it! I teach sociology!
KAYO: <curses self>
SUSAN: My husband's a doctor.
KAYO: Where do you teach?

From then on, Susan repeatedly referred to the social sciences, gently trying to worm out of me what on earth I meant. BWAHAHAHA. When she stepped away for a few minutes to grab Dr. Peter, we threw back our heads and howled at my lame cover story. "I'm pretending I'm a journalist," I told BC, "working on a story undercover." <dabs at eyes>

But despite the awkward icebreaker, we found the doctors and scientists to be warm and unpretentious people, for the most part. Conversing about the symphony was easy, and Susan assured BC, "We hope to see you again. We need more young people." (BC is four years younger than me.)

The program took place in the Grand Foyer of Powell Hall, which was interesting and intimate, but maybe not ideal. They needed to turn down the chandeliers for the slide show, and traffic sounds out on Grand were distracting. There were about 6 tables with 8 chairs apiece - which is how I ended up talking to Susan so much, trapped in the seat next to her - and roving waiters with posh hors d'oeuvres - brie with red pepper jelly, phyllo pizza, nut-encrusted chicken with curry, some sorta mushrooms.

Finally, FINALLY, the program started. Ms. Barbara Orland, the oboist, introduced us to her instrument, and the trials of double reeds. She explained how reeds must be handmade and tailored to the individual's embouchure; how they have to be premoistened, which is why you'll see the double reeds onstage early with their little vials of water, soaking reeds; and she demonstrated the difference between a good reed and a wearing-out reed.

She had with her some cane from which reeds are made, and she showed us what it looked like, saying that it comes from France and no one has had success growing it in the U.S. But then she stopped and said it might just be the pretensions of musicians who believe they have to have FRENCH cane!

Ms. Orland noted that the relative merit of the reed affects her entire family - husband and son nodding soberly - if it's a bad reed, everyone suffers! And apparently giving the A for tuning is one of the hardest parts of being an oboist, because you just never know how that reed's going to treat you.

There were no scuba enthusiasts in the audience, so she explained a little bit about her hobby and where the photos were taken (mostly in the Caribbean, I think) - always with a self-deprecating, "oh, this is nothing" attitude that made her seem very genuine and approachable. She said she's always felt very peaceful underwater, and finds snatches of music running through her head, which is how she conceived the idea to put some of her photos to music.

As for the music, she had selected Benjamin Britten's "Six Metamorphoses After Ovid" - six pieces styled after various gods, beginning with Pan! (You can hear them here.) Only she renamed them to match her six subjects: Descent, Peril (Great White sharks), Decay (sunken ships), Eye to Eye (fish faces!), Structures (coral), and Ascent. Unsurprisingly, I liked the Bacchus piece best; and it matched up to schools of fish that seemed to be dashing around like the frenzy of a Bacchanalia.

I really enjoyed the program, and didn't mind the commercial ("Even if you only give TEN dollars!"), and I kind of wish I had spoken to Ms. Orland and maybe gotten an autograph - but I was SO ready to escape afterward. Before another person could ask my specialty, bwahahaha. Going in, I had cautioned Biker Chick that I might want to flee, and that once I was fed up with being genteel, I would want a burger and a beer. We found a bar in Dogtown and caught the end of the Giants/Packers game, which was a fine antidote.

Only what's up with Favre? I thought he retired like two years ago, but there was his smug underbite leering at me onscreen during the playoffs.

Comments

[Sara]

Little known fact about Sara: I used to play the oboe in the school band when I was younger. My parents said I just wanted to torture them with sounds of a dying goose and outrageously expensive (and often broken) reeds.

[Nicole]

This just furthers my long-standing belief that you must write a book.

Case in point:
Chapter 17
Dr. Kayo and the Biker Chick at the Underwater Symphony

[KayO]

I did not know that!

[Nicole]

This is why I've always known there's a book in there somewhere, Kay ...

CHAPTER 17
Dr. Kayo and the Biker Chick at the Underwater Symphony

Almost has a Tom Robbins or John Irving quality to it, doesn't it?